Every Man's Worst Nightmare
by A Way With Words
Summary: Draco enters the flat and finds Hermione groaning on the floor. And then he finds out why.


**AN: I obviously don't own Harry Potter or any of its characters, otherwise I wouldn't be posting on this website :) **

**Every Man's Worst Nightmare**

Draco strode into Blaise and Hermione's flat confidently. Although he never understood why the two lived together, it wasn't as if they were dating, he respected his friend's decision. But Granger? Who in their proper mind would willingly subject themselves to her constant scrutiny day after day? He was surprised that the two hadn't maimed each other yet.

As he called out Blaise's name, he heard a groan and a shuffle coming from the a bedroom.

"Probably just that damn excuse for a cat Granger keeps." Draco thought to himself. As if drawn by his thoughts, the fluffy orange furball appeared at his feet, rubbing himself onto Draco's black robes and leaving behind at least half of its fur. "Bloody hell…"

Draco had told Blaise that he'd be by to look over some files from work, but it seemed as if he wasn't here. Swearing softly, Draco walked over to the desk as was preparing to leave Blaise a note when he heard yet another groan and shuffle. Telling himself that he was only checking for Blaise's benefit to ensure that there was no one in his house that should not have been, Draco quietly stalked over to the door. It wasn't as if he was remotely curious as to why there were odd noises coming from Granger's room. At least that was what he told himself as he prowled down the hallway.

The door was open, and the first thing he noticed was that her room was a wreck. He smirked, imaging her horror if anyone found out that the ever-organised, ever-nagging Hermione Granger kept her room a mess. His gaze fell upon the montage of happy photos, both moving and unmoving. There were pictures of places from around the world, slightly curling at the edges, which looked as if they had been there for a long time. He scanned the rest of the room and noticing nothing was amiss, turned to leave. Then he realised that a pile on the floor was moving.

After closer inspection, the pile revealed itself to be Granger, cocooned in a patchwork quilt, lying on her stomach on the floor. Only her feet were showing, as well as a tuft of her brown curly hair at the top of the pile. Her bum was rocking from side to side gently, he had to admit that it was a nice, well-rounded bum. His attention was caught once again by the unnatural guttural noises that the pile was making.

"What the bloody fuck are you doing Granger?" he asked her.

"Sod off Malfoy and let me die in peace." The pile responded rudely.

"Language, Granger." He inspected the pile more closely. "Just what are you doing on the floor?"

"Its where I landed." This alarmed him, many different scenarios going through his mind. Was she attacked? Was she truly hurt? He knew that Blaise would kill the bastards who did this. He probably would as well.

"Landed?"

"Indeed Malfoy, landed. Now bugger off." The quilt shifted as she turned to her side and pulled her knees up to her chest. The way that she was responding, the annoyance in her voice as well as something else he couldn't place, assuaged his fears. She wouldn't be swearing at him if she were dying.

"You should at least get to the bed." Draco moved to help her up, but she grunted and shifted away from his outstretched hand. "What's wrong?"

"I can't walk," she mumbled and pulled the quilt up over her face.

Draco moved the quilt down again to find her face flushed and her forehead hot. Tendrils of her curly hair were sticking to her face and neck. "Why, pray tell, can't you walk?"

It was then that the three words that were every man's nightmare left her lips.

"I have cramps."

Draco recoiled as if someone had lit his hand on fire. Granger laughed cynically.

"Yeah, that was what Blaise did too."

Bloody hell, what had he gotten himself into? No wonder Blaise wasn't in the flat, Granger high on hormones was not a happy thought. But the bastard left her in this condition? As he gazed down as the pathetic lump before him, he decided to face his worst fears and help her in her time of need.

"Is there anything you need?" he managed to choke out, his voice only cracking slightly.

"A gun and a bullet preferably."

"Funny Granger, I never figured that you would be suicidal." Draco shifted in order to get his arms underneath her body.

"What are you doing Malfoy?" Granger screeched as she was hoisted into the air. Draco stumbled a little bit over all of the crap on the floor of her room.

Granger was heavier than she looked. "Merlin Granger, do you eat stones?" He looked down into her flushed face and immediately regretted his words. If only he could take them back. Her eyes filled with tears and she began thrashing about, compromising his already precarious grip on her. "Stop wiggling if you don't want me to drop you." She complied and Draco unceremoniously dropped her on her bed.

She immediately rolled away from him and covered her face with the quilt, but Draco could see her body shaking as if she were crying.

"Oh please don't," he groaned. "I didn't mean it Granger, you're not fat." There came no reply. Damn those hormones. "Granger…Hermione, I swear I didn't mean it."

"Yes, you did you arsehole. Get out! I'm miserable enough without you and everyone else telling me that I'm fat!" She still hadn't looked at him. Everyone else? Draco looked helplessly around the room.

He suddenly realised why his words had meant so much to her. He vaguely remembered Blaise telling him that Hermione had self-esteem issues, massive issues. "Her clothes are baggy, she hides behind her hair and her intelligence, she's too self-conscious. Don't bug her about it anymore yeah? It's a delicate enough subject."

Draco cursed his stupidity. No woman deserved to think that she was anything but perfect, not even the annoyingly adorable woman huddled in front of him. He tentatively reached out his hand and touched her shoulder.

"Is there anything I can get you? Tea? Chocolate?" he wracked his brains for more options. "A book?" he added hopefully.

Hermione hiccupped and giggled. "No, the only thing you can get me is a heating pad. There's one in the kitchen."

Grateful for something to do, Draco bounded into the kitchen, only to be baffled by the contents. It was quite obviously muggle. There was a big box-like object that had a handle on it. He opened it up and a blast of cold air hit him. Surprised, he jumped back, promptly falling over a stool and landing on a _very_ aggravated cat. Hissing profusely, the furball shot into the hallway and Draco followed its path. His eyes met a pair of bare feet and his scanned upwards. The feet were attached to pyjama-clad legs and a torso with a quilt wrapped around it and dragging on the floor. Hermione's hair was secured loosely at the top of her head, but it was still as wild as ever.

"Your kitchen attacked me," he stated bluntly.

Hermione giggled again and then stepped around him, plucked something from the counter and threw into yet another box. She poked something on it and it beeped, and then began to make noise.

"What the bloody hell is that?" Draco retreated into the corner, his eyes never leaving the noisy box.

"Its called a microwave," she replied. "Idiot."

"No, not idiot. Wizard." Draco stated as if it was the most common thing in the world.

"Whatever." As Hermione sat down on the couch, she groaned and then shifted into a ball.

"Where does it hurt?" Draco asked quietly.

"Everywhere," groaned Hermione.

Thinking quickly, Draco instructed Hermione to lie on her stomach. She did so, which surprised Draco greatly, but not as much as the lovely feel of her back beneath his fingers. She gasped as he pushed her shirt half-way up her back so that he could massage the pain out of her lower back.

"Shh. Just relax." Hermione's head tilted to one side and she sighed as Draco gently rubbed the knot from her back.

Draco couldn't help but react to her sighs and groans. With each one he had to shift in order to ease the tension in his groin. This was much more erotic than he had thought it would be. She was still completely dressed for Merlin's sake. As he kneaded, he contemplated whether or not it would be considered taking advantage of Hermione in this state. She was like putty in him palms. He leaned down and placed a gentle kiss on her exposed shoulder, then her back.

Suddenly, Hermione flipped over and Draco's hands were left on her lower stomach. She met his eyes, and he saw that hers were shining with want that reflected his own. Her nipples were quite visible through her oversized sleep shirt as she was wearing no bra.

Guided by the acceptance in her eyes, Draco leaned over and touched his lips to hers. They lay there for a moment, getting used to one another in this position. In fact, Draco believed that he could become quite comfortable with this position with this woman. Then she began to truly kiss him and he quickly reassessed his previous thought. He could never be simply comfortable, he would be in heaven.

Encouraged by her eager tongue, Draco cupped the nape of her neck and plunged recklessly into her mouth. The feel of her lips and tongue were too much for him and he growled his pleasure. He slipped his hand underneath her shirt and began to toy with her breast and nipple. He brushed the underside gently then twirled his thumb over the sensitive peak. He left her mouth and glided down her neck, sucking on her collarbone. The groans that escaped her lips were no longer the ones of pain, but of immense pleasure.

Draco skimmed his hands over her stomach while still worshipping her collarbone. He moved to remove her shirt and noticed her hesitation.

"You're beautiful baby. Let me see you." He could still see that she was nervous about showing him her stomach, so he kissed her deeply and eased the shirt up and over her head. "Beautiful," he whispered as he kissed both of her nipples. At this point her hand accidentally brushed his groin and it jerked against his pants painfully. This didn't go unnoticed by Hermione, the observant witch that she was. She grinned at him, and then realization flooded her eyes.

"Fuck," Draco thought to himself. "She's realized who she's with."

In fact, Hermione was well aware of who she was with, but it wasn't this revelation that was important.

"Draco?" she asked tentatively.

"Yeah?"

"You do know that we can't go any further."

Disappointment flooded through Draco painfully. Yeah, she'd noticed alright. "Its okay, I understand." In reality Draco wanted to scream and rage at her and demand she tell him why. He turned from Hermione and heard her shuffling to put her shirt back on. He felt a nervous hand on his shoulder and turned around to have her fling herself into his chest. His arms wrapped around her in reflex, and then he relaxed into the hug. He'd take what he could get at this moment.

"That's not what I meant. God you're thick at some moments." Draco began to protest but was silenced by her finger on his lips. "What I meant was that, do you not remember the reason this all started? I…umm…I'm on my period." She blushed profusely and hid in his chest.

"Oh." Gods Draco felt like an idiot. Of course she didn't want to get it on during that. "Well, I can wait if you can." He purposely baited her, challenged her, and prayed that she accepted.

"Anything you can do, I can do better. You're on." She accepted wholeheartedly with a determined glint in her eye.

"And Draco?"

"Yeah, love?"

"You sure do know how to distract a girl from her cramps."


End file.
